Thursday, April 14, 2011

Adult Temper Tantrums- I want cupcake sprinkles.

How do adults show they are having a temper tantrum? 

Some people shut down, either internally shown by not speaking or showing emotionally.  Some shut down physically by quietly resorting to their homes and sitting in a dark room wearing the same sweatpants until even the dog won't sniff them.  Many men throw their emotions deeper into their work, striving to be a "better provider" by working harder, faster, stronger by focusing on the task at hand.  However, some men go to the bar or their buddies garage for a beer after dinner.

Ladies exercise their temper tantrums in either a constructive or destructive way.  Constructive as in "I WILL HAVE A PERFECT HOME TODAY" and ignore all else until their floors sparkle and the drapes are vacuumed.  Destructive would be "I'm worth these $80 shoes even though my cell phone is about to be shut off and my credit card bill is past due."

My temper tantrums range in motion and season.  Mostly, I start projects.  I will not fix dinner until my hall closet makes any organized professional glean with jealousy.  I go through every box and bag making sure all of the extra toothbrushes are in the correct ziploc bag and my soap bars and perfectly stacked.  Wait.  I'm not the only one who stocks up on toothbrushes when they go on sale, right?   I scrub down my dining room table and chairs with hot water, soap, degreaser, and an SOS pad.  One time I got a blister from scrubbing so hard.  I'm a freak about clean floors, so getting on my hands and knees all Cinderella style doesn't constitute any sort of meltdown, it's just Crystal being Crystal.

Today, however, was a crying day.  I'm tired.  This season in life is hard.  I don't want to sound all complainy but by golly, not every day is puppy tails and cupcake sprinkles.  I'm in a bit of survival mode.  The idea of adding on anything more than what I have now is a scary thought to me.  I run from commitment.  Run far far away.  I do not want to be in charge of or accountable to anything other than the day right infront of me.  And I prioritize like crazy.

My priorities:
Protein for breakfast.  Aka: my kids are getting sick of eggs.  Smoothies are helpful.  And nice fattening tablespoons of peanut butter on toast is helpful as well.  My kids last longer if they get a big healthy dose of protien in them first thing in the morning.  Full fat milk is more filling as well. 

God.  We read and memorize scripture every. single. day.  I have note cards taped all over my dining room walls with "happy" scripture like "He cares for you. 1 Peter 5:7".  Secretly, this momma needs to hear it more than the kiddos.  Right now I lean heavily on "Believe on the Lord Jesus Crhsit and you will be saved. Act 16:31". 

Dear Lord, I am a dead weight on You right now.  Therefore, I could use some savin' right about now.  P.S. Thank you for the hidden chocolate chips in the back of the cabinet.  I know You got my back.  It's our secret.  Amen.

Quiet Time- Dear dear small children.  Please understand that we have quiet time not only for you to rest your toes, elbows, and lips but because it's only 1:30 and mommy needs Tylenol.  So let's play the quiet game so we can tell God thank you for all the nice things we can think of while momma lays down on the couch so she can catch her breath and make it to bed time.  Amen.

I'm sure any other woman would say "Uh, what about laundry and dishes?  PRIORITIES!"  Yes, I bounce back and forth between the two all. day. long.  I get frusterated with washing the "super cool cup with the sparkles and dolphins" for the THIRD time that day, so I go pair up socks.  Then my socks get to the point where they are missing their mate but I refuse to throw the lone sock away because I know I will find it's missing friend the next laundry go-around and will throw my hands up and say "I knew I'd find this stupid sock!  Where were you last week?  Your brother was looking for you!" and go back to washing milk chunks out of the sippy cup that was pushed under the bed so far it was nearly against the wall (and how does it get there?!?).

I just needed a nap.  Some help.  A little support.  I needed a wise old owl to say "You're doing the best that you can.  Your children will not grow up to be horrible people because you had cold cereal for dinner again."

It's just a season.  Everything is just a season.  None of this will be forever.  Forever, is actually the reward.  I'm so glad I know Christ.  So so so so glad.  I'm so glad that I can keep my senses and realize that the baby will not be nursing for forever, that Ernest will learn how to put on a zip up his own coat, and that Ethan will use his strong sense of will power for the greater good. 

And I know that tomorrow they will wake up smiling at me and say "Hi mom!  I'm hungry."


  1. This made me smile A LOT ! I hear ya (: Thanks for the reminder that it is only a season! Being Thankful that I'm Saved & on my way to Heaven,Someday & my family as well THANK YOU LORD is 1 of the best fuzzy feelings I can get throughout a day when I just wanna curl up & sleep till bed time & sleep some more! Summers coming soon,I need it ! We'll continue to keep your family in our prayers<3 Amy Penner

  2. Awww. I wish I could come over and help you out!

    Keep pressing on towards the goal of Christ!

  3. Sometimes, I actually have a temper tantrum and go pound on my bed whilst crying...