Wednesday, October 23, 2013

Biggest Post-Baby Regret

I'm just going to lay it on out there- my biggest post-baby regret is that I didn't encapsulate the placenta. 

Still with me?

Read on dear readers, read on.

Enlightened Mama explains it best, it's just downright good for you.  It makes happy milk, happy mama brain, happy mama body, and so on and so forth.  They'll even steam it up with herbs and dehydrate it for you!

At Emma's birth, I had Kendall take a picture of the placenta because it was excessively huge.  Even our been-there-done-that nurse made a comment it was the largest she'd ever seen.  Thank you??

However, I very protective of the integrity of my placenta and will not put it on the net for wondering eyes to explore.  To each his own.  BUT I SO WISH I WOULD HAVE TAKEN IT HOME!

I even asked Jensen what it would take to get that bad boy outta here and said "A bag."  Very dry that one, very dry.

And the more I read and the more I hear, I can't help but wonder just how wonderful it is.  I personally cannot get over where it came from and will not deny the ick factor that it gives me.  To me, it's like eating a healthy version of a booger.  But I need to get over that if history and women who know say differently.

Maybe it helps shrink the uterus so you don't get the mommy pooch?

Maybe it makes my babies into utterly adorable Michelin babies who have roll after roll of heart melting baby chub?

Maybe it takes away acne?  Arthritis?  Back aches?

MAYBE IT MAKES ME HAVE THE METABOLISM OF A 16 YEAR OLD BOY?!?!?

Now we're talking...

Next time, if there ever is one, I'm doing it.  I'm encapsulating my placenta.  It's not like you can taste it, right?

2 comments:

  1. I am wiping tears from laughing so hard! Crystal, I ADORE you! :)

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  2. Hahahahahaha!!!! This is GREAT!!! You make me feel like I'm sitting next to you while you talk. Next time I'll bring the bag, Crystal!

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